5 Examples Of Boundaries For Attention Seeking Clients

As you grow your Christian coaching business, you are going to want to put clear boundaries and expectations into place so you can serve the exact people God has called you to in the SEASON that God has for their growth. Here’s the truth, what most people don’t realize is that if you are always seeking the affirmation and the wrong kind of attention, when it’s the right time and God’s blessing, the RIGHT kind of attention won’t be given to you because people are just wore out with the striving you create for them relationally. I tell you why I know this first hand in my video:)

First! A coach is always going to challenge you to change rather then a counselor who is going to listen to you process out your pain. As a coach, it is your responsibility to help your clients grow their leadership in a healthy way and avoid sabotaging tactics that will dilute their peace, joy and influence. Attention-seeking is one of the things that completely erodes credibility and respect out of people’s lives so you want to help them eliminate this as quickly as possible. It causes them to look insecure and people don’t want to partner with them because they create so much negativity. 

Before we begin, let’s address that we all need attention but when we seek it from others in an unhealthy way rather than receiving our affirmation from God or communicating simply, hey! I could use some time from you, it’s typically going to produce bad fruit for us.  As a Christian coach, you are going to see some common themes and today I hope to help you avoid taking these clients before they create a bad situation for themselves and your business.

1. The Client Who Feigns Confusion And Helplessness When You Give Them An Assignment

We all struggle. I know I appreciate when my coach goes out of his way to walk me through the process. However, if your client does this habitually and not just once in a blue moon,  this is an attention getting ploy that has paid out for them from other people. You need to share with them that that they could still need a counselor that you are hired to get specific results and will look for ways to challenge not get into how they feel about it. In business and ministry, feelings do not drive action. FAITH drives action.  Ideally, you have not built your business on feeling needed but on the results you deliver for others. Again. if your client can’t take action, they need counseling not coaching.

2.  The Constant Need For Affirmation

Again, we all love encouragement. What makes the difference here is the clients inability to work unassisted. If they want to raise their leadership level they have to be able to work alone, under deadlines and without any affirmation from others. This is the process of helping your client self-actualize their dreams. Compliment them when they take action! Not over their hair or other superficial things. Teach them that spiritual leaders affirm over character not gifting.

3.  Constant complaining.

They need you to explain what you meant in your training over and over. Although you have many other clients who never ask you to explain the very same content. They can’t stay on track or focused and don’t feel like you are meeting their needs, etc. The bottom line is they are used to people listening compassionately and not asking them to move forward in their pain. Have a process in place that you use when you see a client is having difficulty. It should involve a personal phone call, clarifying their grievances and answering them as well as asking them to take action forward to work in pace with you. If they respond, you most likely have a great referral because people appreciate the over the top service. If not, don’t feel guilty for people detaching as they may just need someone who can support them emotionally for a season.

4. Surfing social media endlessly, part of dozens of groups, liking everyone’s post so they get comments back.  Having lots of likes and comments on your business page. 

So, here’s the thing. If you are doing leadership or business training and you don’t encourage your clients to get out of free groups and use social media STRATEGICALLY to grow their leadership or brand, then you are delaying their profitability. Social media can be a huge waste of time if not used with a plan and accountability. I make it a policy, 15 minutes a day to answer and post about how I SERVE and the results I deliver.  That’s it. I get ZERO feel good from social media and watch for my conversion rate yearly. I also end the free in a period of time after six months as if they have valued the coaching most likely they will move into a team environment. I don’t care if you have ten thousand likes that you have bought (because let’s be clear, that’s what happens almost 90% of the time) 465 shares a day on your posts,  if you’re not converting this to clients and your business is multiplying an consistent income this is feeding a need for affirmation that you have. Always evaluate the results is a great boundary.

5. Constantly exaggerating. 

This is probably the number one thing that tunes me into a need for attention. You didn’t just buy a purse. You bought a purse from an Italian designer who lives in the district of…..You didn’t just go on vacation. I see lots of pictures with you jumping up in the air having the time of your life, drinking wine on the RIVERA. Oh my, I need to have your life and then my soul will be full.  There have been many studies done that the more insecure you are, the more you try to project an image of happiness, unity and success in your social media.  Sure share your wins and about your life but share the sabotages too.  If clients struggle with this when they come to me for Leadership training and it goes unaddressed, I know they will hype their client testimonials. The truth will do. Just learn how to share that without exaggerating and you will grow in time.

Need help becoming more confident about your leadership and putting systems into place to serve and grow? This is a great place to begin! 

How To Overcome Rejection And Become More Confident

In this video I talk about how deal spiritually and practically with the feelings of rejection. They are actually a pre-qualification for promotion. If you don’t pass this test, you better not launch a ministry or business coaching because you won’t make it long-term! Watch this and discover how easy it is with God’s help to UP YOUR LEADERSHIP!

*Facebook CLOSED GROUP (FREE homework and next steps from these video’s.) https://www.facebook.com/groups/Beckyharmon/

About Bold Influencers: I help equip Christians transform lives through coaching and speaking.  Get my free START NOW package here that helps you mentor and multiply!


Christian Coach Training: Recognizing Poverty People Quick

How to recognize people in your life who are stuck in poverty thinking. If you grew up in an addiction based of shame-based home, you are much more likely to surround yourself with these kind of individuals because you don’t understand your value. This video will help you discern what specific actions you can take to let go of these kind of individuals and instead trust God to send you the people who need your message and will receive great results from you. Without this kind of identity work, you will not grow your calling!

I help equip Christians to grow their calling in ministry or business and be able to multiply with grace. Get my free START NOW package which includes my book, 4 Phases of Spiritual Warfare and also a free audio on what you need in place to grow a Christian coaching business successfully.

Healing: Do You Need More Of It Before Leading?

In this video I talk about one of the most classic I AM statements that the enemy tells you in order to prevent you from becoming confident and investing any time in training, discipline and time management to set big goals.

*Facebook CLOSED GROUP (Where I give you specific homework from these video’s so you can begin to receive coaching today to develop your calling.) https://www.facebook.com/groups/Becky

About Bold Influencers: I help equip Christian coaches to grow their business with grace and without hype. Get my free START NOW package here: https://boldinfluencers.com/start-her

How To Know If You’re Not Valuing Yourself Correctly As A Coach

How To Know If You’re Not Valuing Yourself Correctly As A Coach | Bold Influencers

If you don’t know how to value yourself or your services correctly you will find yourself feeling disrespected, taken advantage of and from a business perspective not being able to translate your immense gifting into a program that actually helps people get tangible results and grows your profits. I share with you five ways you can know if you need to up your value.

Facebook CLOSED GROUP (FREE homework and next steps from these video’s.)


What Horses Ask Themselves Daily And You Should Too

Sometimes new business owners in an attempt to avoid coming across prideful in their marketing, don’t take enough leadership when they get in front of potential clients.  Part of this stems from a false idea of what is Christ-like in a business setting.

Here’s what’s funny. When I became a horse owner, it helped me become more aware of what I was presenting myself when I showed up for clients.  In this video I share with you the question all horses ask their owners and herd members daily. If you don’t answer this for your clients, you will never be the bold influencer God has called you to be in your business.

Ready to begin influencing for the kingdom through your message? Growing a Christian coaching or speaking business? Get my START NOW package which includes what you need spiritually and practically to grow a profitable faith-based business.

Why You May Not Be Getting A Prophetic Word To Coach or Speak

Has God spoken to your heart about launching a Christian coaching business, speaking for writing your own books that you can share with your testimony? Do you keep waiting for a prophetic word to confirm this or to be RELEASED by your pastor or ministry leader?

Today, I want to talk to you about why God may not be sending you the confirmation you are looking for. It’s not what you think!

Love, Bec:)

Ready to begin stewarding the call of God on your life? Sign up for my START NOW package and receive a free copy of 4 Phases of Spiritual Warfare which will illuminate to you why you’re getting the amount of spiritual warfare you are. I also send you an audio that shows you the exact steps you need to put into place to become a Christian coach with YOUR OWN MESSAGE!

A Prayer & Impartation For Your Calling


Happy Mother’s Day Ladies!

The word of God says in Matthew 10:8 that what we have FREELY RECEIVED we can impart and FREELY GIVE. Today, I hope this is the best Mother’s Day you have ever had. As I pray, I am believing God for an exponential multiplication on your life to glorify God through your testimony!

Let me know in the comments below what you think and what God said to you through this prayer!

If you would like accountability for your calling to write, speak and coach, please let me send my START NOW package which includes my book for FREE as well as an audio on how you can get started creating a profitable Christian coaching business!

Love, Bec:)

Pioneering your calling looks like this

Has God Told You Were Going To Speak Or Write To Huge Numbers Of People?

I have a special gift for you today. I have given you access to a private training in my Leadership Track. (Week 18) This is 4 months into my 10 month program. At this point, most people are asking the question, will I have a business or will I have a ministry?

If you have asked this question to yourself and God has spoken to you about LARGE amounts of influence, then today is a faith defining day for you. I talk about what makes people like colanders that leak out their potential rather than being like Niagara Falls that is harnessed to power and fuel a city. Find out today how you can begin to live a significant life that influences for the kingdom of God!

I don’t put people into my programs without interviewing them first which is why you won’t find my programs listed on my website. I don’t want numbers. I have a spiritual calling to release and equip messengers and I pray and watch over everyone who comes in. It’s a stewardship to me and you are invited to speak with me live in order to help you gain experience and video footage for your website after you go through either program so please sign up for the START NOW package if you want to set up a time for us to speak and talk about your calling to ministry or business. I will call and email you in a couple days of receiving your information and send you my tracks for you to pray over.

How I began To Step Into My Calling And You Can Too

You might not be recognizing how God calls you and so you’re faith is not as strong. Honestly, all divine mission’s begin with a longing to reach others for Christ. However, there is a deep pruning work that often times goes on before you are released. You’re afraid, double-minded and second-guessing if you really have what it takes to succeed. so I share a little of what happened to me to encourage you.
Don’t give up on your dream to see people set free. He will use you to touch and transform others!

Would you like to read about the process everyone goes through who wants to influence for the kingdom? Let me send you my book free and 10 strategies on what you need to do practically to make money as a coach or speaker! Get STARTED NOW HERE!

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